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Discussing Sex With Your Children

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There isn't a topic that a parent could dread more. It's an obviously natural part of human life, but many parents are unsure exactly what they should do and say...


There isn’t a topic that a parent could dread more. It’s an obviously natural part of human life, but many parents are unsure exactly what they should do and say when it comes to teaching their children about sex. How old should the child be? What types of things should you talk about, and which topics should you avoid? In this article, we’ll work towards answering some of these questions so that you can hopefully achieve a clearer understanding of how you should speak to your children about the birds and the bees.

Your children’s curiosity about sex and the differences between the boys and girls may begin to manifest when they are between the ages of three and four. In order to satisfy their curiosity, they may do harmless things such as playing doctor with each other. As long as it is only innocent children involved in this practice, it’s nothing that you need to worry about. At this point, your child may also begin to wonder where exactly babies come from. You may just want to give them some basic information, saying that ‘babies grow inside of the mommy’. This will give you a basis for the sexual education to come in the future.

The main bulk of your child’s education should come when they are old enough to understand the ways of the world, but before puberty hits, so that they will get a good idea of the changes that are happening in their body and they are not bewildered or ashamed due to the differences. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that you make sure that your child is familiar with many of the basics of sex at this point, including what exactly the menstrual cycle is and how it works, what sex is and how it can make women pregnant, methods of using contraceptives to avoid pregnancy, what types of behaviors can spread sexually transmitted diseases, the differences that occur in the bodies of developing adolescents, and what you expect of them when it comes to their sexual behaviors.

It can be difficult to begin the conversation when it comes to teaching your kids about sex. You may be embarrassed or uncomfortable speaking about it, but it is an important step that you need to take. Whenever your child has a question regarding sexual activities or puberty, you need to do your best to be as honest as you can with them. Do your best to mask any embarrassment that you may feel so that your child feels comfortable with discussing the issue with you in the future. The earlier that you develop a good system for speaking with your children about sex the better off you’ll be in the long run. Once your child knows that they can confide in you when it comes to advice about sexual matters you won’t have to worry as much about them engaging in a behavior that they are unfamiliar with. Be open, be honest, and be available, and your child will thank you.

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